The Body Image Struggle

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When I was in high school I dated this guy who was really tall and skinny. One day someone asked me “does it bother you that you weigh more than your boyfriend?”. The thought had never even crossed my mind before that moment and looking back there’s no way that I weighed more than him. However, that one question haunted me and I made it my mission to be smaller than this boyfriend.

I don’t want to get into all of the details about this point in my life but it’s been 11 years and I still think about this question all the time. The question sent me into a spiral of body image issues that I still haven’t been able to fully recover from. 11 years ago I lost 20 pounds very quickly and still hated the way I looked. I basically starved myself and still couldn’t look in the mirror.

I think that body image is an issue that most people struggle with. I gained a lot of weight a couple of years ago but have worked really hard to remind myself that my weight is not a measure of my worth. Most days I do pretty good but some days I’m taken back to when I was 15 and someone compared me to my boyfriend.

On Saturday I went shopping for my Matron of Honor dress for my sister’s wedding. I’ve lost about 12 pounds in the past 6 weeks by eating healthy and moving my body. I’ve tried to keep this health journey really positive but the sight of me in a bridesmaid dress sent me back to a really dark place and I’ve had a hard time pulling myself out of it.

I’ve made so much progress in my body image journey but this proves that I still have work to do. I need to make decisions based on what’s best for my body and not the number on the scale or the image that I see in the mirror.

11 years ago I was asked a question that dramatically changed my outlook on life. Let this be a reminder that the words you say matter.

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Photo by i yunmai on Unsplash

 

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8 thoughts on “The Body Image Struggle

  1. Mark Kent says:

    very very well done for talking about such a effecting issue .people never see the every day effects .there views/judgements are very Snotty Nosed .i have long list health issues like
    migraines i get very bad i am Vomiting all over .i take part in a lot lot research
    my blog.http;//mark-kent.webs.com
    twitter,suppersnopper

    Like

  2. Rosie Culture says:

    I’ve also had one of those life changing comments that made me see myself differently, I’ve actually had a few of them. I grew up with three sisters and we have all been obsessed about our weight for a long time and in college all my friends were obsessed too. Working full time now, I’ve gained weight and have kind of accepted it’s okay as long as I try to be healthy

    Liked by 1 person

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