Dealing With Bad Roommates in College

Dealing With Bad Roommates in College

Hey, friends!

I had way too many bad roommates in college. By sophomore year I thought that I deserved to finally have a good roommate. But fate played a cruel trick on me and made sophomore year ten times worse than freshman.

My freshman year ended with me choosing to live in the same dorm for the next year. I picked a room right down the hall from where I lived and threw myself into the roommate pool. My university had us take surveys to match us with a roommate and I answered very honestly.

I found out my match about a month before move in. I e-mailed her right away to introduce myself but never heard back. I couldn’t find anything out about her on social media but I am a pro internet searcher so right before we moved in I was able to find her. Turns out, she didn’t go by her actual name and instead went by a “stage name”.

Let’s call roommate “P” for the sake of the story. P had already moved into our room when I got there. Our dorm was pretty cool because we had two rooms. The first room had to be walked through to get to the second. P picked the room in the back.

I have no idea how long she had lived there when I moved in but the room was disgusting by the time I moved in. There was trash everywhere and it smelled horrible! My mom and I tried to introduce ourselves but she didn’t move from her bed or acknowledge us. I thought it would get better.

I moved all of my stuff in and got settled. P slept during the day and hardly left the room. I wondered if she went to any classes. I swear she slept with her eyes open too. There was a door separating our rooms but she refused to shut it even when I wanted to change or sleep. At night she’d blare her TV which was against the same wall as my bed. I tried to ask her to turn it down or shut the door but she was super rude about it and I hate confrontation.

My mom works at my university but I hated using her for anything. I didn’t want any special treatment. I went straight to the hall director and he explained to me that I had to stay in that room for two full weeks before I could petition to move rooms. I was devastated.

The more I stayed in the room the more I felt unsafe. I couldn’t sleep, study, or relax in that room. I tried to talk to my RA who came to our room to mediate but it was a joke. My RA actually seemed scared of P and the mediation only made things worse for me.

The hall director gave me two options after my two weeks were up. 1. Move to a single room and pay an extra $2,500 per semester or 2. Choose the only remaining room needing a roommate. I chose the roommate.

This post is already super long so please let me know if you want to hear about Roommate #2. Let’s just say that she was the exact opposite of me in every single way.

I don’t want this post to be negative or to scare you away from having a roommate. I know a ton of people who met their best friends in college and I wish that was true for me. Take the chance on a roommate! Even if it turns out bad then at least you tried and had the experience of living with a roommate

If you are about to start your freshman year I really urge you to take a chance and say yes to new opportunities. You honestly never know when something great will happen and it’s better to put yourself out there then regret not doing anything.

If you are in a bad situation make sure you ask for help. I wish P and I could have resolved our issues but she really didn’t want anything to do with me and that’s okay. You won’t be everyone’s cup of tea and that’s a life lesson that I needed to learn. It’s not okay to treat someone the way she treated me and I’m usually not a quitter. But in this case, I needed to remove myself from the situation in order to feel safe.

Just remember that you never know what someone else is going through. I try not to think too negatively about P because I have no idea what was going on in her life at the time. It was still no excuse to treat me the way that she did but I still wish her the best.

Let me know what your roommate experiences were like!

Thanks for reading!

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6 Things I Wish I Could Tell My High School Best Friend

6 Things I Wish I Could Tell High School Best Friend

Happy Monday!

I had a dream last night about my old high school best friends. Our group of friends fell apart my junior year and by the time we were seniors we barely talked at all. But at one point that group of girls meant everything to me.

In my dream, we were in my friend’s basement where we spent so many nights at. It felt so familiar. The strange thing was that my friend wanted nothing to do with me. I tried to talk to her but she kept walking away.

In real life this friend deleted me on Facebook and has avoided me in public when I know for a fact that she saw me. I made a list of the six things I wish I could tell her but know that I never will.

  1. I still think of you often and hope that you are well.
  2. I have no bad feelings towards you. In fact, I don’t even remember why we aren’t friends anymore. I think we just grew apart but I’m sorry if I did anything to hurt you.
  3. Our friendship meant so much to me. I’m glad I had you in my life even though it was only for a few years.
  4. I’m proud of you. From what I can see, it looks like you are living your best life. I used to know all your goals and aspirations and even though things have changed, it still looks like you have lived out your dreams.
  5. It really hurts that you deleted me on Facebook. I know it doesn’t matter but I feel like you just erased me from your life.
  6. I’m still here if you ever need to talk to anyone.

Friendships can be tricky and the older I get the more I realize this. I don’t think I’ll ever have a group of friends like my middle/high school group of girls. Things weren’t always perfect but I knew that they always had my back. So much time has passed that I don’t remember why we are no longer friends and the truth is that I don’t really care.

I do have two girls from elementary school that I am still friends with. Our friendship has stood the test of time and even though we are hundreds of miles apart I know we will be friends for the rest of our lives.

Are you still in contact with your high school friends?

Thanks so much for reading!

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2018: Third Quarter Goals

2018 Third Quarter Goals

Goooood morning and Happy Monday!

I can’t believe that we are already half way through 2018! This year is going by so quickly and now that summer is here I would really like time to slow down a bit 🙂

You may be wondering why I do quarter goals instead of monthly or annual goals if you haven’t read my first and second goal posts. I really like to give myself extra time to complete goals so monthly goals are out of the question. However, a year is too much time to concentrate on my goals so splitting them into four parts makes them more manageable!

The second quarter of 2018 proved to be a very trying time for me. I learned a lot but I am happy to leave the events in the past. I’m ready to have a fresh start in third quarter!

  1. Finish unpacking. Yes, we moved in March and yes, we still have a few boxes to unpack. I’d love to go into fourth quarter with an unpacked house with fully built furniture. Moving is hard and I feel like we will never run out of things to do but we are loving being homeowners!
  2. Teach Oscar some basic commands. Oscar can already sit pretty well and is on his way to being fully potty trained. I would love to focus on his leash walking skills, stay, shake, and getting him to fully recognize his name.
  3. Create some work-life balance. Ugh, this is so hard for me but I really need to learn to put myself first! I have been so stressed at work and it’s not good for me or my co-workers. I have been trying to leave on time, take lunches, and get up from my desk instead of being locked up all day.
  4. Finish up all of our remaining wedding items. This includes picking up our wedding video from the videographer, writing vender reviews, finishing our wedding album, writing some wedding related blog posts, and thanking the many people who helped make our day special again.
  5. Go on a date with Brett. I can’t remember the last time Brett and I truly went on a date just the two of us. I would love to see a movie, go to dinner, or grab ice cream and just chat. We have both been so busy and I honestly miss him! Some nights we have to stay up late talking because we haven’t been able to spend any time together and we have a lot to catch up on.
  6. Start planning our next adventure. I miss traveling and I am longing to get out of the country for a bit. Our honeymoon in London was SO fun and I constantly think about it. Brett and I have so much fun traveling together and right now he works for an airline so we fly stand-by for free. We need to take advantage of these benefits and get away!

These are just a few of the things that I am hoping to accomplish over the next couple of months! I know 2018 will be over before we know it so it’s time to really kick my booty into gear!

Thanks for reading!

Lifestyle Blog, Life of Hayley

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Let’s Chat About Instagram!

Instagram, Blogging, Social Media Blogging
Hey, friends!

I’ve been thinking a lot about Instagram lately and I wanted to get your opinion on it.

I see SO many bloggers connecting with other bloggers on Instagram and I really want to join in on the fun. I have an account but I use it for my personal life and have friends and family follow me. I feel awkward promoting my blog on my personal Instagram. I go to post something and think “no one cares about your blog” and delete it. 90% of my Instagram posts never even make it to the public.

So, what I want to know is what is your opinion on having an Instagram account just dedicated to your blog? I’ve been blogging for almost five years and still don’t feel super comfortable promoting myself to people I know outside of blogging so I think I need to create a separate account.

Would it be okay to create a new Instagram?

Let me know what you think! I would love to discuss!

 

Lifestyle Blog, Life of Hayley

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What It’s Like To Be An Introverted Blogger

Why I Struggle With Blogging - How To Survive When You Are An Introverted Blogger

Hey there,

Lately I have been asking myself a lot of questions:

Why do I struggle sharing my life with others?

Why am I so hesitant about telling people about my blog?

I obviously feel the need to share at least some of my life with the public, so why can’t I share it with people that I actually know?

The list goes on and on.

I am so tired of beating myself up over things that I can’t change or questions that I don’t have the answer to. I don’t know why I am the way that I am. All I know is that I struggle to make the changes that I feel I need to make.

I have said before that it is okay to be an Introvert. But it is SO hard living in world where everyone expects you to be an Extrovert.

As children we are forced to raise our hands in class because if we don’t the teacher will call us out in front of the class or we won’t receive any participation points. I always felt like I had to sit in the back of the classroom in order to be able to learn anything. Just because I am silent does not mean that I am not listening. In fact, when I am silent and not worried about being called on, I am actually learning so much more.

It is so important to understand the different types of personalities instead of trying to cram everyone into the same category. I, for one, am exhausted of people trying to tell me how to act or how to feel.

When you market yourself as a blogger, it seems to be assumed that you are outgoing and personable.

I struggle with blogging because I love the creative outlet but I hate being compared to everyone else. I hate trying so hard to fit in a box with everyone else when I feel so different.

I just need to keep reminding myself that it is okay to be an Introvert. And it is more than okay to be an Introverted blogger.

Does anyone else out there struggle with blogging?

Thanks for readings!

 

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Friday Introductions

 

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Hey friends!

Since I re-launched my blog in late 2017 after taking a year long break I figured now would be a great time to introduce myself to my new and old followers.

For starters, my name is Hayley, hence Life of Hayley. If I had to categorize my blog I would say that it is a “Lifestyle Blog”. I love to share my favorite products, books, travel, and most recently, wedding planning. Not only do I love blogging, but I also love reading other people’s blogs. I am also looking for new bloggers to follow!

I began this blog in November 2013 right when I was turning 20 as a way to document all of the things I wanted to accomplish before turning 25. It’s been four years and I am so proud with how far I have come! I will be 25 next fall and I feel more than ready. I have accomplished far more than I ever thought possible and am in love with the way my life is turning out.

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My biggest accomplishment was studying abroad in London in 2015. I was SO scared to move to London for a semester but it turned out to be the best decision. I made life-long friends and cherish the memories that I made along the way. London will always feel like home!

I graduated from college in April 2016 with a Bachelor of Business Administration. I majored in Electronic Business Marketing and minored in General and International Business. After I graduated, I began looking for a full-time job in my field. I ended up accepting a position at a financial company in September 2016. I expected to like the job but never expected to fall in love with it! I love my company, my co-workers, and the work that I am doing every day. I really feel like I am making an impact on my community and our client’s lives.

Wedding Planning - Wedding Pictures

On August 19th, 2017 I married my boyfriend of six years, Brett. Our wedding day went by so quickly but it turned out better than we could have ever imagined! We got married at a Lake where I spent most of my summers growing up. We were surrounded with all of our favorite people; our friends, family, and co-workers. Everyone who joined us had made an impact on our lives in some way. It was so special to start our married lives with all of the people who we love the most.

Brett and I went on a two week Honeymoon in London directly following the wedding. It was just like coming home. Brett proposed to me in London so the city holds a special place in both of our hearts.

Now I am just enjoying life with Brett and our cat, Lucy. We live in a cute little apartment and love spending time with our friends playing trivia or old PS2 games. I love tea, The Crown, Harry Potter, and reading. I’m an introvert who greatly values my alone time. I am also a Target addict and a wannabe interior designer.

Welcome to my little corner of the internet. I hope you stay awhile!

 

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5 Tips for Post-Grad Success

5 Tips for Post Graduation Success

As a recent college graduate, I understand the highs and lows of post-grad life. Figuring out what your next step should be is a scary task. Let me start out by saying that everyone is different and what worked for me may not work for you. However, it is always nice to know that someone out there understands what you are going through.

So, here are 5 tips that worked for me in achieving post-grad success:

Step 1: Figure out what you want. This sounds hard but it’s really actually pretty simple. Start off by asking yourself if you want to continue your education or look at starting your career? Or maybe you want to take a year off and travel? The decision is completely up to you! I really thought that I wanted to pursue a Master’s degree after graduation. I studied, took the GMAT, thought my world was ending, and moved on. Grad school is not the right decision for everyone and it’s perfectly okay if you decide to move on.

Step 2: LinkedIn. I was lucky enough to start my LinkedIn during my sophomore year at college for a class. If you don’t have a LinkedIn, join! It’s really easy to setup your account and start connecting with your classmates, friends, co-workers, professors, etc. LinkedIn is an amazing job search tool but you should start one even if you are not currently searching for a job. It’s a great place to document your achievements and goals.

Step 3: Give yourself a break! This was a huge thing for me. I was so hard on myself after graduation. I had this picture in my head of all of the amazing things I wanted to do and I felt as though I had failed. Take the time after graduation to do some soul-searching. It’s okay to move in with your parents and figure some things out. I took a couple of months to enjoy life before hopping into the work grind. This may be the last time in your life to be selfish by just enjoying a little down time.

Step 4: Figure out your professional life. Invest in clothing and accessories that make you feel and look like an adult. I never wear makeup and rarely put any thought into my outfits but it’s nice to have a nice outfit to wear to an interview that makes me feel confident. If you don’t have a lot of money to spend on clothes, start out small and buy basics that you can build on.

Step 5: Breathe. Everything will be okay even though right now it feels like your life is a giant mess. Just breathe. You will fall down a few times but as long as you are able to build yourself back up, everything will be okay.

I hope this helps! I cannot describe how much I struggled after graduation. But after over a year, I am successful in a job that I absolutely love! It’s in a field that I never imagined I would enjoy but I do. So hang in there, friends!

 

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Coming Out of Retirement

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For the last year or so I have considered myself to be a “retired blogger.” Blogging was something that I just didn’t have time for and I honestly had lost the desire to keep writing about myself. I felt like no one cared and that I couldn’t compete with all the other bloggers out there. I thought maybe I would come out of “retirement” one day with guns blazing and this new amazingly re-branded website. And maybe that will still happen one day but for today I will just try to do the best that I can.

The reason I want to start writing again is simple. I am about to turn 24 and I started this blog as a way to document the 25 things I wanted to do before turning 25. With my 25th year quickly approaching I figured it was time to kick my booty in gear and get this list done.

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So, here I am. A lot has changed since my last post and maybe I’ll write about all of that one day. For starters, I graduated from college, started a career, moved into my first adult apartment, and got married! Life has been very exciting for me and I am happy to start blogging again!

 

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